Kool-Aid Man, Jolly Green Giant and Little Caesar top mascot brawl picks
Charles Entertainment Cheese has killed before and will kill again, he is a must-get The Kool-Aid Man possesses the strength and durability to crash through a brick wall The Jolly Green Giant is, of, course a giant and will return to his "bones to make your bread" roots if pressed And The Noid.
Crystal Frasier8Are you insane? You have to take Wendy! If only because she's slightly less likely to kill you if you're on her side. And the 'Noid is a bigger threat to himself and his allies than he is to his enemies! What the hell, Zoe?!
Graham Johnson3The real problem/wildcard is The King. Who is either a cryptid or just a dude. Depending on which version is coming for you, it might be unstoppable.
🔩Joan3the Noid has Done Things
Max the comics guy who does comics about comics2Meat giants eat meat people, vegetable giants eat vegetable people. You should be safe.
Eleanor1Don't sleep on Chef Boyardi. He's surpasses the boundaries of the real and achieved mascot apotheosis. Nobody even remembers that he was once a mortal man.
Sen 🏳️🌈1If someone doesn't put The Noid on their team they don't know The Noid.
the colonel for a friendly face mr. peanut for financing the operation kool-aid man for demolition wendy for extreme violence beyond all comprehension
Sheila Toastcarraldo3Wendy is the only one who can defeat the Noid
Zippy Tuna3Big Boy comes with rockets though, as seen in the documentary "Austin Powers"
Ian Gaida2The Colonel is the only one who has actually killed someone
TomServo421She makes square burgers, clear psychopath
Akhier Dragonheart1Hmm. Kool aid man, Wendy, the King, and Jack. With something like this, you need to focus on how cartoon logic they are while being able to succeed. The Noid, for instance, is full on toon, but always loses. The Colonel is a man and despite some toonification, hasn't gone full Wendys.
Very uneven power spread there. If I claim Ronald McDonald (magic), the Jolly Green Giant (strength), the Burger King (stealth) and the Noid (tech), then the only threat left on the board is Kool-Aid Man, and he's got some obvious weaknesses.
Pop Arena12The thing about Chester Cheetah is that while he has skills, he's basically the Trix Rabbit, destined to fail to get the snack he wants because of cartoon logic. He'll come at you at great speed, and fall right into an open manhole. bsky.app/profile/oneo...
Dani2Okay, but if we're going off of everyone's history, Chuck E. Cheese had a history of having technicians turn off his fellow performers and Ronald may as well have been in Derry.
Professor Ezekiel Q. Calamity, PhD2Don't forget that The Noid can skateboard, among other skills. It's essentially a ninja
Linkara2I'm going for the Colonel, at least. As a military man, he may have strategic skills that can aid in combat with an overwhelming force. ...And yeah, jolly Green Giant, too. Only so much strategy can save you from a kaiju.
🌹Sub Rosa🌹1Jolly Green Giant, Big Boy, Cool-Aid Guy and Chester Cheetah. 3 juggernauts and a cavalry scout. My front line alone would sweep the board
caseyw1286.bsky.social1What about Chucky though? The way his eyes shift when he looks at you makes him somewhat of a wild card in my opinion. He’s the one you always underestimate in which he uses that to his advantage to gain the upper hand. I’d be careful of him…
Kool-Aid Man. Unstoppable. Puts the "jug" in "juggernaut." Green Giant. Physically imposing. He'll take many off the board from the get-go. Ronald McDonald. A master of psychological warfare and reality warping. Access to a LOT of backup. Pillsbury Doughboy. He'll T-1000 others while LAUGHING.
YesBiscuit5I lived in Seattle when Jack in the Box literally killed four kids and that guy is still going so I'd want him on the team. Colonel Sanders - you know he's got a shotgun under the counter, definitely pick him. The owl was always useless. Ain't no one picking the owl.
robertus5... does the Burger King command the Burger Legions?
Ryan4The King: terrifying stealth psycho Wendy: savage beatdowns and savage burns Charles Entertainment Cheese: the original version. Gives that mafiosa vibe. Will make you sleep with the cheeses. Jolly Green Giant: weaponizes explosive diarrhea.
bobby_hill_real3I'm mostly in agreement but I'm replacing the doughboy with the Burger King because that MF is a master of stealth and I do *not* want to get ninja killed. Doughboy's shape changing advantage is negated by fire + he's tiny
R2-Danielle23There’s only five I trust: Little Caesar, The Jolly Green Giant, Colonel Sanders, Big Boy, and Chef Boyardee. I fear Chef Boyardee would be too distracted trying to convince everyone his dishes are authentic Italian and be useless, so: Little Caesar The Jolly Green Giant Colonel Sanders Big Boy
Drewthulu3Just wait til Boy-ar-Dee busts out the Parmesan cheese dispensing nunchucks
Obviously the Green Giant Chester Cheetah looks like he’s got PCP strength The Kool Aid Man runs through walls like the goddamn Hulk And the Colonel, if he’s still commanding a brigade. If not I’ll go w Little Caesar, who depending on the period might be more trouble than he’s worth
Mike (beep boop era)4Jfc that iteration of Ronald McDonald looks like he’s got a whole troop of dead Boy Scouts in his basement tho
Karen M. Poremski2Yeah, I picked Kool-Aid Man first because of the wall-busting abilities.
Rob Codey1That rat will be the last thing standing. God knows what pestilence and disease his filthy ass is carrying. Infect the others and move on, just like they always have.
Lady Starblade1Nope, Wendy’s my first pick…a redhead who puts effort into her hairdo? She will shank a rat and slap a Pillsbury into next week. Plus, you know she got beef with Ronald and the King. 😆
